Patricia Oliver is the mother of Joaquin "Guac" Oliver, one of the 17 victims of the tragic February 14, 2018 shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School (open in new tab) in Parkland, Florida. A few months later, Patricia and her husband Manuel turned their grief into action and founded Change the Ref (open in new tab): a non-profit organization that empowers the next generation of leaders through art and non-violent creative expression. Here, Patricia shares her feelings on the two-year anniversary of her son's death and her desire to continue inspiring people across America to make a difference.

As the anniversary of his death approaches, I feel like something is wrong. That is how I feel today. My loved ones, Joaquin's friends, we all feel, wow, time is passing. More depressed, more depressed. At the same time, it feels like yesterday. When the shooting happened, I made a promise to Joaquin in my heart. I didn't know what the answer was at that moment, but I knew I had to do something to make a difference."

This is not something to be taken lightly. My husband and I had to do something to help people understand. This is not a political thing. This is a social thing. This is an emotional thing. I did not lose my contract, I did not lose my job. I lost my son. I lost my love. That love cannot be obtained with money. Money will not bring Joaquin back. We must feel safe in every way, everywhere. As human beings, as members of society, as members of this country, we deserve it. If we are here now, we may not be here five minutes from now.

That's why we founded Change the Ref (opens in new tab), a non-profit that uses art and emotion to inspire children and parents to do something for a better future. Every time Manuel and I are out there (creating murals for change and talking to people in the community), people say, "Wow, what can I do for this?" Because that's what society is looking for. Because that's what society is looking for. They need the connection and they need to know that you want nothing more than to be with them for the mission. So we offer people the opportunity to connect to actions that will create a better tomorrow."

We decided to travel the country (to create art) because we continue to see different situations related to gun violence. In everything we do, guns play a leading role. We have to be safe, and we have to stay safe wherever we go. You, me, and everyone else. We are not just looking at Coral Springs or Parkland. We are beyond that. [I have a play starring my husband called GUAC: My Son, My Hero, which has been playing in Miami since September. It is about Joaquin, and I am always in the audience. It tries to show us as a normal family (before this incident). I mean, the father tells the story of the family. We all know what happened to Joaquin, but you really have to know what we were like and what Joaquin is like. We love it when he says, "I still am." After the show, people come up to us and say, "Oh, now I know Joaquin, now I know Joaquin, Joaquin is a part of me, Joaquin is with me." At the same time, the thought of me as a parent, me as a person, me as a mother, me as a normal woman, is awakened. What am I doing? That is the purpose of this play. It connects real-life situations with emotions. This is not a film that you can watch and say, "Wow, this is not true."

Joaquin is a very friendly kid. He's a great leader. He has a lot of friends. He always loved school and all school activities. He was the one to lead his classmates. I met some of them. They came to me afterwards and said, "You know what? "And it is beautiful. He was always happy to be surrounded by friends and family. He was always trying his best to be with someone. When I was working, he would call me and say, "Mom, when are you coming home?" He would call me. We used to cook together. He was always so loving, so kind and caring. Super son.

I am not an artist like Manuel, but I talk to people at events all the time. They come up to me and tell me how much they admire me and how motivated they are to see us parents at these events. At the same time, I try to motivate them to do something for themselves because we are all on the same path. The feeling I get from them is what keeps me going. I am getting involved with more and more people, mostly children and mothers. It's wonderful. At the end of the day, I am accomplishing what I am asking of myself.

I hope that in this year's election you will take the time to find out who you are voting for and what they have to offer. We must be responsible. This is a very important year and we must do our part. We have to work as a team. We must have knowledge of what is happening to the candidates. We are giving them a job to do and they must understand it. We cannot just say, "I am blue and I am going to vote blue. That is not the answer. We need to hear the candidates' answers. You have to take the time to vote.

If you would like to donate to Change the Ref (opens in new tab) to help Patricia and Manuel empower the next generation of leaders and end gun violence, click here (opens in new tab).